Questions to Ask Friends
Questions about the two of you, for a friend you already know well and want to know a little better.
- Time
- 10–30 min
- Players
- Two or more friends
- Best for
- Sleepovers, catch-ups and long drives
- Deck
- 150 questions in 6 categories
How to use these questions to ask friends
- Pick a category from the menu under the card, or keep “All categories”.
- Read the top card aloud and let everyone answer it, going around the group.
- Swipe the card away, or tap “Next question”, for the next one. Questions do not repeat until you have seen the whole category.
- Tap the heart to save a question on this device, or tap “Make a 10-question list” for a list you can copy.
When to ask your friends these questions
Old friends often talk about everything except the friendship itself. These questions give you a reason to tell the stories you both half remember and to catch up properly on what is happening now.
Catching up after time apart
After a summer away, a move or a busy semester, Life right now and Plans for us fill in the gaps faster than “so, what’s new?”
A sleepover or a slow afternoon
With nowhere to be, Memories together and How well do you know me can fill a whole evening, one story leading to the next.
A friend’s birthday
Pick a few cards from Our friendship and read them over cake. The answers say more than a card from the store.
Ways to ask these questions
Swap the phone, swap the question
Sit across from your friend with one phone. Read the top card to them, hear the answer, then hand the phone over so they can read the next card to you. Stay in one category until you both want a change.
Write it, then compare
Pick the How well do you know me category. The friend being asked writes the answer on a scrap of paper first, the other guesses out loud, and then the paper is turned over. Close guesses and wild ones both make a good story.
A group of old friends
When three or more friends get together, pass the phone around the circle and let each person read a card to the friend on their left. Memories together works well here, because everyone else gets to add their side of the story.
Tips for a good talk
- Start with Life right now if you have not seen each other in a while, then move to Memories together once you have caught up.
- Any card can be skipped. If a question lands too close to something hard, say “next” and pick it up another day.
- Heart the questions that led to the longest answers, and save them for the next sleepover or long drive.
All 150 questions to ask friends by category
The complete list, grouped by category. The cards above draw from the same list, so you can read ahead here and play there.
Our friendship
First impressions, the roles you play and what keeps the two of you close.
- What was your first impression of me, and how close was it to the real me?
- When did you realize we were going to be real friends, not just people who knew each other?
- What do we have in common that most people would never guess?
- If our friendship were a board game, what would the rules say?
- Explain one of our inside jokes as if to a stranger. Does it still sound funny?
- What’s one way we’re completely different that actually works well?
- Which of my habits did you get used to the fastest?
- When our whole group hangs out, am I the planner, the joker, the peacemaker or something else?
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- If our friendship needed a team name, what would it be?
- How do you know I’m in a bad mood, even when I say I’m fine?
- What’s something you can only talk about with me?
- Which of your other friends would get along best with me, and why?
- Do we feel more like siblings, teammates or a comedy duo?
- What’s the longest we’ve gone without talking, and was it strange to pick back up?
- Which are we better at together: making big plans, or doing nothing at all?
- What’s one thing I taught you, even if I didn’t mean to?
- If someone filmed our friendship, which scene would open the movie?
- Why is it so easy for us to sit quietly together without it feeling awkward?
- Which disagreement between us made us better friends afterward?
- What unspoken deal do we have, like who picks the snacks or who texts first?
- How has our friendship changed since the year we met?
- What part of being my friend takes a little extra patience?
- What keeps us close when we’re both busy with other things?
- Which three words would you use to describe our friendship to someone new?
- Who is usually the one to suggest hanging out, and who is the one who says yes?
Memories together
Shared stories, from the day you met to the plan that went sideways.
- What’s the first thing we ever did together that you still remember clearly?
- Which day together made us laugh so hard we couldn’t breathe?
- What plan of ours went wrong but turned into a great story?
- Which place do you picture first when you think of the two of us?
- What’s the best thing we ever cooked, baked or built together, even if it looked strange?
- Which sleepover or late night together do you remember best?
- What did we use to do all the time that we’ve stopped doing?
- Which photo of us tells the best story, and what happened right after it was taken?
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- When did we get the most lost together, and how did we find our way?
- Which game did we play so many times we could do it in our sleep?
- What’s a time I showed up for you that you never forgot?
- Which snow day, storm or heat wave did we spend together?
- What was the silliest thing we ever argued about?
- Which school, club or team moment of ours would you relive for one day?
- What small thing I gave you do you still have?
- Which outing, near or far, do you count as our best one?
- Tell the story of the time we got in a little bit of trouble together.
- Which food tastes like a day we spent together?
- What did we try once and agree never to try again?
- When did one look from me make you lose it in a quiet room?
- What’s the best surprise one of us ever pulled off for the other?
- Which ordinary afternoon with me turned out better than any big plan?
- Tell the story of how we met. Who remembers it better?
- Which outfit or haircut from our past should we never be allowed to forget?
- What were we talking about the last time we stayed up way too late?
How well do you know me
Guess your friend’s snacks, habits and little quirks, then check the answer.
- What’s my go-to snack when I’m watching a show?
- Guess my least favorite chore.
- What would I order at a diner without even opening the menu?
- Which color do I always pick when I get a choice?
- On a free Saturday, how would I spend the first hour?
- What’s the one thing I always forget to bring?
- Which of my stories have you heard the most times?
- Where would you find me at nine on a Sunday morning?
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- What do I always say when I get excited about something?
- What was I like at seven years old, based on everything you know about me?
- Which pizza topping would I pick, and which would I pick off?
- Which superpower would I choose, and what would I use it for first?
- Which shoes would I wear every day if nobody stopped me?
- How do I like my eggs, or do I skip them completely?
- What makes me laugh every single time, no matter what?
- What do I do when I’m nervous, like tap my foot or talk faster?
- Guess what I check first when I wake up.
- What’s my comfort food after a long day?
- Name my biggest pet peeve.
- If I could keep only one thing from my room, what would it be?
- What would I name a boat if I owned one?
- Which game do I refuse to lose at?
- Which word do I use way too much?
- What do I always have in my bag or pockets?
- Which seat do I always grab first when I walk into a room?
Life right now
Catch up on the week, the month and what’s on your friend’s mind lately.
- What’s taking up most of your thinking time these days?
- Which part of your week do you look forward to most right now?
- What have you gotten into since we last had a real talk?
- Which day this month would you happily live again?
- Is there anything you’re working on that you haven’t told me about yet?
- What small thing has been bugging you lately?
- Which song, show or game are you hooked on this month?
- Who have you been spending the most time with lately, besides me?
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- What are you proud of from the last few weeks?
- Which part of work is going better than you expected?
- What have you been meaning to do for weeks but keep putting off?
- What’s your favorite snack this month, and how long will that last?
- How full does your calendar feel right now: packed, just right or wide open?
- What were the best five minutes of your day today?
- What has surprised you most about this year so far?
- Which skill are you practicing at the moment?
- Where in your home are you spending most of your free time lately?
- What are you looking forward to in the next two weeks?
- Is there something coming up that makes you a little nervous?
- How have your mornings been looking lately?
- Which new person in your life should I hear more about?
- Which opinion of yours has flipped in the last few months?
- If this month had a title, what would it be?
- What are you enjoying more now than you did a year ago?
- Which meal have you had on repeat lately?
Plans for us
Day trips, shared hobbies and small projects for the two of you to try next.
- What’s a day trip we keep talking about but never take?
- Which skill could we learn side by side, like juggling or knitting?
- What yearly thing should we make ours, like a first-snow walk or a summer bike ride?
- What would we do with one whole Saturday and a bus pass?
- Which recipe should we attempt together, even if it goes badly?
- Which place nearby has neither of us ever visited?
- What would our perfect sleepover look like, from snacks to lights out?
- If we started a club with just two members, what would it be about?
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- What could we both do every day for thirty days, as a challenge?
- Which game should we finally learn the rules to?
- What could we make together this month: a puzzle, a blanket fort, a short video?
- For our next picnic, who brings what?
- What’s something we’ve never done together that you’d like to try?
- Where should our first big trip together be, someday?
- Which hobby could we share, so we have a reason to meet every week?
- How should we spend the next day it rains from morning to night?
- What’s one thing you’d include if you planned my perfect birthday?
- Which series should we start at the same time, so we can talk about it?
- How should we stay in touch if one of us moves far away?
- In ten years, what do you hope is still the same about us?
- What’s a goal we could cheer each other on for this year?
- Which free thing in our town should we finally do together?
- What would we put in a box about us, to open together in five years?
- Which talent show act could the two of us actually pull off?
- What small kind thing could we do together for a neighbor?
Advice and support
How to cheer each other on, give good advice and help on a hard day.
- When you call me upset, what’s the first thing you want to hear?
- What’s the best advice I’ve ever given you, and did you take it?
- Which piece of your advice do you wish I had listened to?
- What are you good at that I should ask you for help with more often?
- How can I tell you need cheering up, even if you don’t say so?
- What should I do if I notice you’re having a rough week?
- Besides me, who do you go to for advice, and what are they best at?
- What’s something hard you got through that I might not know about?
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- When you’re trying something new, what do you want me to say?
- Which of my worries do you think I make bigger than it is?
- What would you tell me if I were about to give up on something I love?
- Which kind of pep talk works best on you: funny, calm or loud?
- What mistake of yours would you warn me about, so I don’t make it too?
- Is there a choice coming up that you’d like a second opinion on?
- When I’m stressed, what do you notice first?
- What do you think I should give myself more credit for?
- After a bad day, what cheers you up most: a joke, a snack or a walk?
- Which of your strengths do you wish I borrowed more often?
- If I were nervous before a big test or game, what would you tell me?
- What’s the nicest way to tell you there’s something stuck in your teeth?
- When we disagree, what helps us get back to normal fastest?
- Which of your goals could I help with, even in a small way?
- What’s the best way to tell me something I don’t want to hear?
- Which compliment from me would mean the most right now?
- On a day you doubt yourself, what should I remind you of?
Frequently asked questions
How many questions to ask friends are there?
There are 150 questions, 25 in each of six categories: our friendship, memories together, how well do you know me, life right now, plans for us, and advice and support. The cards and the list on this page use the same set.
Are these questions for a best friend or a new friend?
They are written for friends who already share some history, from a best friend of ten years to a classmate you see every day. For a couple, try questions for couples, and to turn the guessing into a game, play how well do you know me.
Can siblings or cousins use these questions?
Yes. Every card is about friendship, home, hobbies and plans, with no romance and nothing private, so siblings and cousins who are also good friends can use them at a family get-together.
What should we play after questions to ask friends?
Try deep questions to ask. They go a step further, into values, growing up and what you hope for, and they work just as well between two friends.