Christmas Jokes with Punchlines
Santa, snowmen and gingerbread in one-line puns, with the punchline one tap away.
- Time
- 5–20 min
- Players
- One or more people
- Best for
- Holiday dinners, office parties and drives to see relatives
- Deck
- 100 jokes in 5 categories
How to use these Christmas jokes
- Pick a category from the menu under the card, or keep “All categories”.
- Read the setup on the top card aloud and let everyone guess the punchline.
- Tap “Show answer” for the punchline, then “Next joke”, or swipe the card away, for another. Jokes do not repeat until you have seen the whole category.
- Tap the heart to save a joke on this device, or tap “Make a 10-joke list” to copy jokes with their punchlines.
When to tell Christmas jokes
A Christmas joke takes ten seconds to read and a few more to groan at, so it fits every short gap in December. One phone and one reader are enough, and the punchline is always a tap away.
While the cookies bake
Read a few Holiday food jokes while the timer runs. By the time the tray comes out, someone has already guessed “they knead the dough”.
The office holiday party
Santa jokes and Tree, lights and presents jokes make an easy opener for a group of coworkers, with nothing personal in any of them.
A quiet evening on the couch
After the guests go home, trade Snowman and winter jokes back and forth until one of you can’t keep a straight face.
Ways to play with Christmas jokes
Guess the punchline
One person reads the setup aloud and everyone else calls out a punchline of their own. Then the reader taps “Show answer”. Anyone who gets it word for word reads the next card, and a funnier guess than the real one earns a round of applause.
Keep a straight face
Take turns reading a joke to the person on your left, who has to hear the punchline without smiling. A grin, a snort or a groan passes the phone along. Snowman and winter jokes and Holiday food jokes are hard to sit through with a straight face.
A joke at every place setting
Before the holiday meal, tap “Make a 10-joke list”, copy it and write one setup on each place card with the punchline folded underneath. Between courses, each guest reads their setup aloud and the table guesses before the card is unfolded.
Tips for telling a good Christmas joke
- Pause for a beat after the setup. Puns like “a lost Claus” land best when the room has had a second to try a guess of its own.
- Read the punchline slowly and plainly. Jokes such as “hay-zelnuts” or “stable tennis” turn on how a word sounds, not how it is spelled.
- Count a groan as a win. These are holiday puns, and an eye roll from the whole table is the sign the joke worked.
All 100 christmas jokes by category
The complete list, grouped by category. The cards above draw from the same list, so you can read ahead here and play there.
Santa jokes
Chimneys, the sleigh, the red suit and the big man’s summer plans, one pun at a time.
- Why does Santa always come down the chimney?Answer: because it soots him
- Where does Santa stay when he goes on vacation?Answer: at a ho-ho-hotel
- What’s Santa’s favorite sandwich?Answer: peanut butter and jolly
- Which state does Santa like best?Answer: Ida-ho-ho-ho
- Who brings presents to every cat in town?Answer: Santa Claws
- What do you call Santa after he moves to the South Pole?Answer: a lost Claus
- How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?Answer: it was on the house
- What kind of money does Santa carry?Answer: jingle bills
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- Which sport is Santa best at?Answer: North Pole vaulting
- Why did Santa put a clock on his sleigh?Answer: to watch time fly
- What does Santa shout at the start of a race?Answer: “ready, set, ho!”
- Where does Santa hang up his red suit?Answer: in the Claus-et
- What does Santa say at the very last house of the night?Answer: “that’s a wrap”
- Why is Santa so good at karate?Answer: he has a black belt
- Where does Santa go swimming in the summer?Answer: the North Pool
- What do you get when you cross Santa with a detective?Answer: Santa Clues
- Which party favor do ducks pull at Christmas dinner?Answer: a Christmas quacker
- How does Santa say hello in Hawaii?Answer: “aloha, ho, ho”
- Why does Santa hurry back to the North Pole before sunrise?Answer: there’s no place like ho-ho-home
- When Santa reads out each name on his list, what does everyone answer?Answer: “present!”
Reindeer and elves jokes
Hooves, antlers and the North Pole workshop, from stable tennis to the elf-evator.
- Where do reindeer go to buy their gifts?Answer: the deer-partment store
- Which game do reindeer play in the barn?Answer: stable tennis
- Why are reindeer such good dancers?Answer: great hoofwork
- Why do reindeer wear fur coats?Answer: they’d look silly in sweaters
- How does a reindeer start a letter to Santa?Answer: “Deer Santa”
- What does a reindeer say when it drops the map?Answer: “oh, deer”
- How does a reindeer pay for lunch?Answer: with a few bucks
- What do you call a reindeer wearing earmuffs?Answer: anything, it can’t hear you
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- Which part of the newspaper do reindeer read first?Answer: the herd-lines
- Which part of the band would a reindeer join?Answer: the horn section
- Which nuts do reindeer like best?Answer: hay-zelnuts
- What does a reindeer say when the sleigh is running late?Answer: “better hoof it”
- Why are elves such good listeners?Answer: they’re all ears
- What do elves practice on their day off?Answer: elf-care
- Why did the elf take a ruler to bed?Answer: to see how long he slept
- Why do elves build toys so quickly?Answer: they’re elf-icient
- How do elves get to the top floor of the workshop?Answer: the elf-evator
- How do elves send notes across the workshop?Answer: by elf-mail
- What did the elf say about the toy instructions?Answer: “they’re elf-explanatory”
- Which dance do elves do at the workshop party?Answer: the North Pole-ka
Snowman and winter jokes
Carrot noses, icicles, penguins, polar bears and a snow globe that gets all shook up.
- Why was the snow globe so excited?Answer: someone shook things up
- How does a snowman get around town?Answer: on an icicle
- Which game do snowmen always win?Answer: freeze tag
- Which island would a snowman pick for a winter getaway?Answer: Brrr-muda
- What did one snowman whisper to the other?Answer: “do you smell carrots?”
- How does a snowman spend his day off?Answer: he just chills
- Why do snowmen stay so calm at parties?Answer: they never lose their cool
- Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?Answer: they don’t have pockets
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- What does a snowman order at the deli counter?Answer: cold cuts
- How do penguins build their houses?Answer: they igloo them together
- What do polar bears eat for lunch?Answer: ice-burgers
- Why was the icicle so relaxed?Answer: it was just hanging out
- Why did the ice skater bring a pencil?Answer: to draw figure eights
- Which relative do penguins visit every winter?Answer: Aunt Arctica
- What do you call a long line of snowmen?Answer: a cold front
- Why did the snowboard keep yawning?Answer: it was board
- Why was the sled so tired after the party?Answer: it had a long run
- What do you call a snowman on roller skates?Answer: a snowmobile
- How does a snowman start a conversation?Answer: with an icebreaker
- What does a snowman do when he’s annoyed?Answer: gives you the cold shoulder
Tree, lights and presents jokes
Ornaments, string lights, wrapping paper and the pine in the corner of the living room.
- What kind of news do Christmas lights follow?Answer: current events
- Why couldn’t the bow come to the party?Answer: it was all tied up
- Why do ornaments love the Christmas tree so much?Answer: they’re totally hooked
- Why is a wrapped present so good at keeping secrets?Answer: it keeps things under wraps
- What did one Christmas tree say to the other on a gloomy evening?Answer: “lighten up!”
- What does a Christmas tree wear on a cold night?Answer: a fir coat
- Why did the Christmas tree get so many compliments?Answer: it was all spruced up
- Why did the pine tree end up on the naughty list?Answer: it was being knotty
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- Why did the glass ornament stay so calm?Answer: it won’t crack under pressure
- What kind of songs do Christmas ornaments love?Answer: ball-ads
- What did the star say when it saw the tree’s lights?Answer: “I can top that”
- Why couldn’t the Christmas lights fall asleep?Answer: they were too wired
- Which subject do Christmas trees like best?Answer: geome-tree
- Why are presents such great storytellers?Answer: great delivery
- What did the wrapping paper say to the scissors?Answer: “cut it out”
- What kind of party does a present like best?Answer: a surprise party
- What does a Christmas tree do before a long trip?Answer: it packs its trunk
- Why did the Christmas tree take up a new hobby?Answer: it wanted to branch out
- Why did the string of lights win the quiz?Answer: it was the brightest
- Why are gift bags so easygoing?Answer: they never get wrapped up
Holiday food jokes
Gingerbread, candy canes, hot cocoa and cookie trays fresh from the oven.
- What did the platter say to the holiday cookies?Answer: “dinner’s on me”
- Where does a marshmallow go to relax?Answer: a hot cocoa tub
- How does hot cocoa describe a sticky summer day?Answer: mug-gy
- What kind of cookie aces every quiz?Answer: a smart cookie
- Why did the chestnut get roasted?Answer: it told one bad joke
- What does a gingerbread man say when he meets someone new?Answer: “iced to meet you”
- Why is a gingerbread house so easy to sell?Answer: it’s in a sweet neighborhood
- What did the gingerbread man say to the cookie cutter?Answer: “you really shaped me”
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- What does a cookie say when it slides off the plate?Answer: “oh, crumbs!”
- Why do bakers work extra hours in December?Answer: they knead the dough
- What did the baker say when the first tray burned?Answer: “better luck next batch”
- What did the candy cane say after a swim in the cocoa?Answer: “that was mint to be”
- Why do cookies love basketball?Answer: they’re great at dunking
- What kind of weather do sugar cookies like best?Answer: sprinkles
- What does a gingerbread man say on Christmas morning?Answer: “merry Crisp-mas”
- What kind of pie do they bake at the North Pole?Answer: brrr-y pie
- What do you call a chocolate that never shows up on time?Answer: choco-late
- What did the oven mitt say to the hot cookie tray?Answer: “I can handle it”
- What side dish does a snowman bring to dinner?Answer: cold-slaw
- Why are bakers so good at holiday parties?Answer: they rise to the occasion
Frequently asked questions
How many Christmas jokes are there?
There are 100 Christmas jokes, 20 in each of five categories: Santa jokes, reindeer and elves jokes, snowman and winter jokes, tree, lights and presents jokes, and holiday food jokes. Every joke comes with its punchline, shown on the card when you tap “Show answer” and printed under it in the list on this page.
Are these Christmas jokes clean enough for work or a family gathering?
Yes. Every joke is a gentle pun about sleighs, snowmen, ornaments or cookies, and none of them pokes fun at a person. They suit an office party, a team lunch in December or a long table of relatives.
What is the difference between Christmas jokes and Christmas riddles?
A joke here is a short setup with a pun for a punchline, made to get a laugh or a groan. Christmas riddles are puzzles with clues you can work out, like what a nutcracker or a snow globe would say about itself. Both reveal the answer with one tap.
What should we play after Christmas jokes?
Try Christmas charades to act out wrapping a gift, sledding down a hill or Santa squeezing down a chimney without a word, or Christmas trivia for questions with real answers about holiday traditions, food and classic stories.